无力感

I have been trying to work forever but can't seems to find the right formula or attitude to start my job.I don't seems to cherish the opportunity i have with this work.

I crave to hunt people down from the outside world. From facebook, friendster, voipstunt, to hear the familiar voices again. I crave to meet new people, from the friends of old friends, from organization yet hesitate to become unseperable. I wanted to find a safe zone from the 'danger' zone everybody's talking about. I wanted to find a motive where nobody seems to see in me．I need a reason to wake up early and go for something i believe.

How does it feel to communicate with a person from the outside who never step his head into the cyber world? He never uses the email, nor the Msn chat, nor visited any of my blogs or details online. Thanks to him, i seem to balance myself for presenting too much in the cyber world.

What is there left to present when all the details are typed in black and white? What is there to think when my thoughts are never clear if it weren't written out?

Why is following a path so difficult for me? Why is finding a path even worse than following one?